...Is there such a thing as a fashionable straightjacket?
I'm going to call it writer's syndrome, though there may be a real name for it, I expect it's fairly common. I've had this kind of eenui for as long as I can remember—it's not terrible, just...there. The gist of the feeling is this: no matter how good life gets (and life is pretty awesome; I love life), I can imagine better. So far, I don't sound too special, I know. Everyone has those moments, whether they're ambitions, imaginings, dreams. But being a writer, specifically a writer of fiction, more specifically a writer of fantasy, I am always dreaming, and my dreams are always impossible. And since I write, I have to imagine the impossible thoroughly as if it were everyday life. While I'm writing, I'm living the impossible, and it's difficult to pull myself out at the end. They say that what is even worse than knowing something is impossible, is having even the slightest hope that it isn't. Now I'm not not a head case; I don't believe in fairies, etc. But I do believe that in order to write about something convincingly, a writer has to find something very close to belief in the moment that she is tying words together from pure inspiration and putting them down on screen or paper. The result is a sort of warring Yin and Yang (yes, I realize that's contradictory) of hope and belief in one's own stories, and the knowledge that none of it can ever exist.
...Is there such a thing as a fashionable straightjacket?
7 Comments
10/25/2012 12:34:04 pm
I love your blog!! Interesting thoughts, beautifully expressed. then the punchline:
Reply
Miranda
10/25/2012 01:35:40 pm
Hi Rick!
Reply
10/26/2012 02:25:05 am
I thought of a book you would like: "Being Wrong" by Kathryn Schultz.
Miranda
10/26/2012 09:49:48 am
I've looked it up, and I've definitely seen it before. It sounds really interesting. I've added it to my list of about 300 books I'm planning to read :)
Reply
Miranda
2/9/2014 11:44:00 am
Yes, that one particularly resonated with me! Gaiman writes so many /true/ things about writing. I'm sure the process is different for every writer, but there's a universal experience and creation of something real that didn't exist before (even in non-fiction), and I think that's kind of magic. I'm definitely shamelessly escapist in my writing.
Reply
Leave a Reply. |
Miranda Phaal
Miranda Phaal is a college student born in San Francisco and currently living in Boston. She first became interested in writing at age seven when she wrote a series of short poems. From there she started writing short stories, and then novels. She has a couple of story collections in the works now, as well a couple of novels. Archives
July 2016
|